Applying Jessica Benjamin’s Theory From Bonds of Love to the Real World

Benjamin’s theory makes clear what I always knew was there. I always knew there were relationships like teacher and student, man and woman, adult and child but now Benjamin’s theory is making me realize that these are binaries and there is more behind it than I thought. She says that in order for someone to have power over another, someone has to submit therefore, there needs to be domination and submission. For example teacher and student. The dominating role is the teacher and the submissive role is the student. With good grades or gaining knowledge as an incentive, students will listen and do what their teachers say. Teachers technically can’t tell the student exactly what to do but the students choose to listen because they know it will benefit them. This gives overwhelming control to teachers and can dictate a lot in students’ lives. Benjamin’s point is important to understand because there have been many times in my life that I have unknowingly submitted to power which is not necessarily a bad thing but sometimes these relationships can turn harmful. Therefore understanding this concept I can choose to not submit if it is unhealthy, causes me harm or is unnecessary for me to succeed.    

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