Jessica Benjamin challenges the ways of sociology with her theory on power and identity. Bonds of Love is an extensive take on her beliefs, but every word she says draws more understanding of her ideology. Benjamin believes in individuality and the concept that an individual needs to connect with another individual. We can and should recognize other individuals and feel both similar and different from each other. She believes the mutual recognition of each other as a subject must be equal. If one doesn’t recognize another as a subject, it tarnishes a relationship. Benjamin believes that power comes from ones lack of attention to another, creating an unknowing superiority. Domination and submission are the consequential roles when a subject fails to fully recognize another subject. Jessica Benjamin’s theory of power and subjectivity is very unique, but logical. The cognitive and sociological side of relationships is rarely investigated and Benjamin created a whole new ideology on it.

Drinking Coffee Elsewhere covers so much ground in such a short story. I didn’t even realize the title was right there in the book until I reread it. Within the title lies such a deeper meaning. From Dina’s P.O.V I believe this phrase was an ode to what Dr.Raeburn mentioned about pretending. I felt it was somewhat unfair to criticize Dina for pretending or putting up walls when its clear shes had a rough time. On some level don’t we all pretend? Don’t we all make snide comments, or say things to protect ourselves from being hurt? Dina is portrayed as being out of touch with the world when she really is the closest iv’e seen to being in tune with her emotions. I do believe she was harsh when speaking to Heidi, but when you are so used to acting one way, its quite difficult to just change how you respond. The significance of this title is a complete circle back to her “pretending”. She is simply just someone who’s a little to honest. Which is a blessing and a curse.